Monday, August 31, 2009

Oaths of Moment

I had a really fun day. I think I needed it more than I did any of the days before. Not that anyone here really knew. Not that many people ever know.

I went out to breakfast with my grandfather to this little place in a township everyone here lovingly refers to as Mayberry. Some place that's been there longer than most people reading this have been alive, run by the same people by the same standards. And so on and so forth. Great food.

After that, our trip to the butterfly garden turned into an adventure through the Mall to visit the little Borders inside and ended up a trip to the movies. District 9. Go see it. Everything you've read or heard about it being good is true. I cannot tell a lie! I thoroughly enjoyed every minute of it, much to my surprise.

For some reason within the mall they had super gigantic catfish. And an ice rink. I didn't get a picture of that but you bet your ass I got pictures of the super giant fishes. For some reason, despite the crowd near the pond, they thought I was there to feed them. Which presented golden opportunities to get pictures. In fact I got several... interesting photos from the mall.

The Borders outlet there didn't have what I was looking for, so we then went to the big Borders outside. This was like the mega Borders. Could fit two of the Borders from where I'm from inside of it, easily. Two floors of wonderful, wonderful books.

I picked up Horus Rising. Because I'm a fking dork. Me standing in that isle of books caused some kneeling guy sorting through Magic cards to fall over and a clerk to ask me if I was lost. I'm like, "No. I am exactly where I want to be, thank you." Why it's so hard to believe I read geeky things is always a curious thing to me. Didn't they get the memo? Smart is cool now.

My grandfather also gave me a bunch of books to read from his own collection. He has a favorite author now. It's cute. One of the books had some sort of bug in it and it ate little holes clear through a bunch of pages. It makes the book really interesting to look at. I don't know what it'll do for reading it, though. I'm a little nervous about putting it along with my other books out of fear they will meet a similar fate.

Betrayal indeed.

I'd better go. This is the largest banana daiquiri I've ever seen.

Sunday, August 30, 2009

Pasta in Clam Sauce

My uncle is a superb chef. He made the best pasta I've had in a really long time last night. Haven't had pasta anywhere near that tasty since my grandfather used to take me to this little old Italian guy's place called Joe's in Detroit. Back when we used to go to the theatre. Ironically, Joe wanted to be a barber. Go figure.

The internet here is as I expected it to be. Perhaps a scoch worse due to the weather. It's sunny today, but it has yet to truly improve. I've yet to get a reliable signal in my room here (sparrow room). When I want to be online I either need to go to the pier or to the room I stayed in last time (monarch room). Oh well.

Speaking of the pier, I got some sketches done there yesterday, dropped my eraser into the lake. Luckily it floats. Have yet to read, not enough alone time to get into it really. I played Sims 3 this morning for some silly amount of time due to a lack of anything else. I made a super fat guy and experimented to see how long it would take to make him super skinny. It didn't take very long. I was disappointed.

Received some crappy news today. I don't really want to talk about it, though. So I won't.

My uncle also made me some brownies. I'm eating one right now. Delicious, healthy brownie. I may go out to the lake again in a bit. I'm undecided. Part of me wants to go hang out in the lovely weather while the other part of me wants desperately to cling to every tiny bit of internet I can find, knowing it will be gone all too soon. Perhaps I'll be an uber nerd and take the laptop down to the water with me. We'll see.

There was a wasp in my bathroom (caramel room) the other morning. I didn't have my hearing aid in and was leaned in towards the mirror putting on mascara so I couldn't see it either. Even so, for some reason I stepped back and looked over in it's direction. One of those gut instincts, I suppose. A feeling you just can't shake until you give in to it. Good thing I did. Wasps are an Inari's natural enemy.

I've been sweetening my coffee with honey instead of sugar while here. It's pretty tasty I must admit. What I found interesting is the honey is vintage. Older than I am. Evelin's mother kept it up until she passed away, then Evelin inherited it. I didn't know untouched honey kept so long and in fact actually improved with age, like wine. Untouched, mind you. Once you start dipping into it you introduce contaminants that'll spoil it with time. Learned something new!

Everyone is gone today. It's just me and Lovey, my aunts toy poodle. That dog is a genius. Everyone keeps waiting for it to actually say something. She's become my little buddy. Much to everyone's surprise. They know I'm good with animals, but the dog is picky and aloof with everyone but my aunt and grandfather. She practically begs for me to pay her mind. It's cute. If Evelin and I go into separate rooms she stands halfway between, torn.

Won some money on the Travers race yesterday. Wanted to see if I still had my childhood knack for picking ponies. I do. Sadly I'm here, not there and just took these people's money. Haha. They shouldn't have bet against me. At least not my grandfather, he knows all too well my ability to pick a horse.

Step 1: Ask how many horses.
Step 2: Listen to answer.
Step 3: ????
Step 4: Victoly!

I'm still not sore from treatment. I keep waiting to wake up unable to move, but it hasn't happened yet. Fingers crossed.

Friday, August 28, 2009


I arrived in Chicago safely, as opposed to dangerously (ty for reminding me). The drive was something like seven hours due to traffic, stopping and so forth. Which is fine, I wasn't in any hurry. I used the time to collect nifty pictures along the road. If there were a better signal strength here in the manse, I'd upload them. Instead you'll have to wait.

There were police everywhere along the way. I'm not sure why. At least three or four times the normal amount. Lots of three-trailer semis too, which should be illegal. They sway all over the road carelessly. There is no reason to have three full sized beds hitched to one truck aside from trying to avoid paying three drivers. There's a reason trains run on tracks and not on roads, afterall.

I also saw an amusingly named hotel. It was called the Saunter Inn.

I had a wonderful time last evening. We watched a great movie from the sixties that I can't even begin to try to spell at this hour and lack the internet fortitude to Google cheat. Hilarious, though. Then we had delicious food and watched Futurama. I also began treatment when I arrived, wasting no time. I'm not as sore as I thought I would be. Hopefully the pain doesn't sneak up on me later.

Finally managed to get enough of a satellite signal through the rain to get online only to almost immediately fall asleep. Sorry about that, guys! I was mighty tired. Didn't help that my bed is huge, my blankets soft, and my pillows here are like laying on fluffy clouds. To complicate matters my laptop crashed long before I woke up to check my messages. So it's like last night never happened!

It is rainy today, too. I think I brought the weather with me. Even now, I type this in Word because signal strength plummeted so low I lost connectivity of any sort. I am so far secluded from other humans that when the weather gets particularly bad like this, I even lose the signal on my cell phone. /boggle

Thankfully I thought ahead and brought a bag of books to read and a sketchpad (that I am using as a mouse pad because I forgot that). I love the rain, but I do hope it lets up soon. Aside from the internet I would like to go draw at the end of the pier at the lake. That just seems all sorts of nice.

Edit: You may notice various references to the obscene time this was written and given it is 9pm now that make's little sense. The reason is I originally wrote this at around 7am and only just now managed to find a room with high enough elevation to find any internets!

Wednesday, August 26, 2009

Chicago, Here I Come

Mmm, liquid warmth.
Last night I dreamt of androids, vampires, special agents, and an island. Use your imaginations. It was awesome.

We had a BBQ this evening as a last day here for a while kind of thing. Any more than a couple of my family members in a room is always hilariously entertaining. We had some kickass chicken. Seriously. So good. Or maybe I was just extremely hungry. Whatever. I'm thinking of going up in my pajamas to thief a piece to right now. Why not?

Lots of driving tomorrow. At dawn. Haven't decided if I should sleep early to be up at that absurd hour or if I should just stay up. The official start of my two weeks in Illinois soon as I step out of that door!

I've stocked up on essentials and have everything packed so that I can slack off guilt free tonight. Shampoo, conditioner, comb, toothpaste, toothbrush, lotion, facewash, make-up, jewelry, clothing, shoes, bathing suit, sweater, books, paper, pencil, pen... I don't think I've forgotten anything.

I'm bringing my fresh brussel sprouts, too. They will spoil if I leave them here. So I shall take them with me. I'm sure that will raise a few brows, "You brought brussel sprouts with you?"

Heck yes I did.

Monday, August 24, 2009

A Couple of Weeks

I'm back in Ohio until Thursday morning and then it's back to Illinois to dwell in a mansion for two weeks while I go back and forth for various medical treatments. Including pills that are supposedly going to kick my ass to hell and back for a week. Sounds fun.

Then, back to Ohio for a doctor's appointment here! The dreaded Scope test. Dun dun dun!

So enjoy me on (relatively) stable internets while you can, internet people! Come Thursday I'll be live via suckallite again.

I may be a little busy during the day until then. I never packed for this many days up here so I've been wearing the same several outfits over and over again and just doing a lot of laundry. I think it's time I added some additional wardrobe. My nights should be open though!

I feel like I am forgetting to mention something important, or maybe not important at all but just interesting. In either case I can't remember. So. The end!

Sunday, August 23, 2009

Long Drives & Weddings

The stay in Chicago was good times. As always. How can you not have fun in a mansion on the lake? Honestly. I didn't get much sleep before the drive to Michigan though, so the journey was something awful. I don't even remember falling asleep the night before, just that I was awoken less than three hours later. I kept trying to sleep in the car, but people were insistent on talking to me so that was impossible.

Someone confronted, "I thought you were going to sleep on the ride?"
I'm like, "How? You keep talking to me. I can't do both!"
Not that I mind conversation, but don't ask me why I haven't slept when you've made sure of it the whole way! Haha.

Driving through Illinois is a neat thing. Driving through Indiana is boring as hell. I think the most exciting thing I saw in Indiana was a flock of sheep. Illinois has Chicago to go through, Michigan has Detroit. Indiana has... yeah.

Ben's wedding was great. I got to see a ton of people I have not seen in something like 10-15 years. As well as some people I have never met before. It was amazing. I think they will do well together.

We had an awesome time. Highlights include Holly climbing a tree in high heels, capturing toads beneath the tables, Heidi catching the bouquet, Ben getting cake-faced, dancing until the cows came home, playing drunken Tetris Attack (??), and passing out trying to watch Transformers 2. Oh and plenty of Jell-o shots.

I think I've hit my monthly alcohol quota.
 I don't check out of this suite until Monday afternoon, so there will be no time for monster slaying this evening. Unfortunate if I didn't have a ton of fun things to do irl because rumor has it we'd be killing some uber monsters tonight.

Friday, August 21, 2009

Your Mom

Today we are spending the day with Paris Hilton's mom. Yes. Indeed. You read that right. Paris Hilton's mother. I'm not sure exactly what to make of that. What would you make of that?

High levels of lol predicted.

Thursday, August 20, 2009

Safe Landing

Here's to flying!
The plane was super super tiny and the flight was super super bumpy, but I've arrived no worse for where. I took lots of pictures, even snuck a few after they had firmly instructed all electronic devices to be powered down. They actually used that phrasing. For a second I thought it was 1991 again.

I was in charge of the laptops, which must have looked quite silly. Me, walking (sauntering perhaps???) through the airport with not one but two laptops strapped across me. Like some sort of computer junkie or something. Oh wait...

I'm safely in Chicago now, live via satellite internets. I have extremely limited connectivity because I am not close enough to space. So bear with me. When I'm not super busy in real life I'll be combating low signal strength because rich people like to life in huge mansions in the middle of forests.

WTB rocket ship. It worked for Major Tom right? Right...?

I feel like I am in an extremely posh episode of Dawson's Creek. If anyone remembers that stereotypical teen drama. If I walk outside there is wilderness and a lake. If I want to go the neighbor's house the fastest route would be taking the boat to their dock. Kind of neat, except all the chandeliers leave me feeling constantly under dressed.

I am having fun though, and being productive, outside of right now, so all is well in Inaritopia. Which I suppose is a given otherwise it'd be called Inaridistopia?

Like OMG

I'm slowly running out of time online! In less than an hour I will be at the airport causing a ruckus with security, no doubt. Then it's milling about with a lack of anything to do for two hours while I wait to board. Then I fly through the sky to Chicago! After a few days there I drive, across the ground if we're counting, to Detroit! Two, two big cities in this little journey. I'm thinking large.

I decided to wear a skirt today. A skirt. Yes. Absurd. I know. Also, a hat.

You better be looking at the coffee pot.
Also, a hat!
To those of you in Illinois: I'll see you soon.
To those of you in Michigan: I'll see you later.
To those of you anyplace else: It'll be a while.
To the Internets: Distance, heart, fonder, etc.

Monday, August 17, 2009

Yellow & Black Trefoil

Today's test took a total of three hours and was relatively painless. Played out pretty much exactly as the video included in the last entry, except I was in a room lined with lead and I couldn't take in my purse because they thought I may smuggle radioactive egg out. I have no idea why I would do that, let alone anyone else. Like I'd make a dirty bomb out of nuclear egg or something? The deadliest midnight prank?

That bottom line indeed reads: will be emitting radiation!
The bit that worries me, considering I have a flight in less than a week and they always do all but strip search me under normal circumstances is "Airport alarms may be triggered for up to 12 weeks." Oh good, this time I'll lock down the airport and give them a reason to detain me...

Breakfast Time!

Going to the doctor for eggs and toast. See you all in a while!


Saturday, August 15, 2009

Belly Full o' Almonds

Home at last. It felt like today's running around was never going to end.

There was a minor crisis this morning when I came to the realization that my social security card is in Florida. You need those to get IDs renewed these days. I didn't panic though, I know things always work out in the end somehow and thus couldn't help but giggle at the situation, much to everyone else's annoyance.

Which, low and behold, things worked out. I can now board the plane next weekend ID in hand.

Shopping was shopping. I got tons of food, spent tons of money. Nothing new there. I forgot to mention in the other blog that I had a hair appointment this afternoon at the spa. So, I had a hair appointment this afternoon at the spa. It was fun. Being pampered is always nice.

I get bored easily. New hair color is new.
Then it was off for my blood work. Turns out one of the tests had been inappropriately performed, so basically this was a do-over. The vial was supposed to have been frozen and it wasn't. All of the actual nurse people had already left so the rotund, nervous lab tech came and did it. Horribly. He kept clamoring around for things and losing things and when he stuck me with the needle he did so like you see on TV medical shows. Like House or E.R. -- where they literally stab you with it for no reason.


By then I was super light headed (had to fast for the blood test, also have to fast tomorrow, thats like barely any food all weekend) so I took my mother out for Chinese food. Sooooo much Chinese food.

Still no sleep. Who sleeps at 6pm on a Saturday?

Friday, August 14, 2009


I have to be up for a day's worth of activities by 8am tomorrow, it's 1am and I'm not tired at all. I guess I'll just be pulling another 24 hours of sleeplessness. I have to go get my ID renewed tomorrow so that I can get on the plane next weekend. I wonder if they'll pull me aside to test for explosives residue this time? They always do.

Then it's off to shop. I don't like shopping. It's another one of those female traits I never picked up on. I do like new things and food though, so it's a necessary evil.

After that I go to give all the rest of my blood to doctors. They decided that the vials I gave earlier in the week weren't enough and need more. My arm hasn't even healed yet. I won't need a diagnosis soon, the lack of blood will do me in.

I received a letter from the doctor today. To prepare for my Nom test Monday, I get cut off of all food Sunday. So I'll be lacking sleep, food, and blood. That sounds like a marvelous combination of fun, doesn't it?

I also learned that the correct medical term for the Scope test is esophagogastroduodenoscopy. Say that 5 times fast.

Thursday, August 13, 2009

I'm Gonna Be On Tv


My doctor appointment wasn't so bad yesterday, more blood loss. Six vials worth. The technician was the world's gift to blood draws. I didn't feel a thing at the time. Feels like a lamprey made a meal of me today, though. Tracy? Stacey (that's not my name)? I'll have to make sure only to get blood drawn when she's on staff.

That's realistic.

The doctor was a nice guy too. A portly middle aged man with a good sense of humor and Billy Mays' beard. Doctors with humor are too hard to find. Most of them have such sterile personalities. This is the sort of dude you'd like to go have a drink with on Fridays or beat up in Street Fighter if he weren't your doctor.

This guy is scheduling me for two more tests. Trying to figure out why I don't absorb enough calories and vitamins from my nom noms. The first, they are going to feed me two eggs and a piece of toast laced with some sort of chemical contrast then lay me down under an x-ray device and watch me digest them. That just sounds all sorts of neat.

My stomach's going to be on TV!

The second test, rather funny story. The doctor says, "Well it's more invasive. We're going to take a scope..." and I'm thinking in my head, "Oh god, not a scope. Those never go anyplace pleasant from the stories I've heard." But he says then, "And force it down your throat..." and I must have looked so happy and relieved because he paused and said, "Most people don't seem that happy about this test." So I just laugh and say, "Dude, you have no idea what I was thinking!" then we both laugh.

So for the second test they intend to shove a scope down my throat and peek around the inside of my stomach in real time. Not cool, dude. Though he promised to give me, as he put it in medical terms: really awesome drugs. So I won't care. The idea still sounds horribly unpleasant though.

I have no idea when these tests will be coming my way, scheduling at the hospital was already closed by the time I was done being seen by the doctor so they have to call and let me know. Then there was the ordered blood work described above. Which by the last million or so blogs is nothing new to me.

Afterward I went out to dinner. Went to this little Italian place with my mother and had some kickass food. Naturally the serving sizes are humongous so I needed to put my left overs in a box. I wanted to take my dressing with me but for some reason had no lid, so my mother decides she will wipe off her lid to put on mine and we'll be all set. So she sets to that chore, meticulously, finishes and I go to put my dressing into the bag only to realize there is no lid. She'd taken the time to thoroughly clean the lid from her dressing for mine, only to put it right back onto her dressing.

She's probably reading this from her iPhone going, "You little shit, you did put this on the internet!" Because I had threatened to yesterday. All for the lols, Mom, all for the lols. <3

When I got home I did not pass go and collect $200 dollars. I went straight to jail. Only by jail I mean I passed the heck out on my sofa. Loss of blood and lack of sleep the day prior likely the culprit. I feel refreshed now!

I'm in the mood, are you ready? I'm in the mood.
Art. Today. Be ready.

Nom Test: August 17th
Scope Test: September 10th.

Saturday, August 8, 2009

Peaceful Internets and Angry Hornets

Internet guy came at last. Replaced a section of wiring and also gave me a new modem. Things seem to be working, at the moment, so I'm happy as a clam.

Happier than this clam at any rate:

Waiting for him meant I had to stay awake. All day. I'm running on coffee and sugar at the moment. Sleeping now would mean my schedule is completely fraked, so I figure I'll just stay up longer and make it 24 hours. Why not?

I got to catch up on one of the shows I watch while waiting though. I was so right in my instinct of what ancient mythological creature a certain someone was! It just so happened to be rerun day on HBO or something. Before that I drew a couple of things in graphite that I'll need to ink and get up now that the internet is reliable (supposedly).

Hopefully this means no more 19 hour internet black outs, or random drops in the middle of conversations/gaming/uploading.

I think that perhaps the hornets and I share a psychic link. Like the Arbiter and her Scourge confetti. Why? Because for all the internet frustration and lack of assistance from my ISP the hornets attacked the technician on sight. Dive bombed him the moment he hit the bottom step. The very bottom step I'd seen at least 12 times prior without incident and I'm rather known for my profound ill luck. They must have had it out for this guy because they knew deep down that I had it out for this guy. It's clearly the only reasonable assumption to jump to.

Don't worry, he was unharmed. Scared the piss out of him though, which admittedly made me giggle.

Thursday, August 6, 2009

Ribbon Cutting Fun

Your ribbons, we cut them!

So I was invited to the official ribbon cutting ceremony for the new hospital because of my mother's position as leader of the free world. This should be fun. It combines several of my favorite things: hospitals, rich people, and champagne.

Therefor I'll be gone for a few hours this evening to attend that. Ironically the internet will probably be dapper the entire time I'm not home and then go out soon as I walk back through the door. It always seems to be working well when I don't need it to be and gone completely when I do.

In unrelated news after much internal debate, I could no longer resist and ate my last M&M. Note the mouthful of delicious regret once it's realized there are no more to be eaten.

 Also unrelated news, we had a hornet nest in the foundation of the house up here so we filled it full of cement... only the ingenious little bastards burrowed out through the other side into the basement now. So there is a house full of angry hornets buzzing around. You know the worst thing about hornets? They can sting you multiple times. What's even worse than that? I'm deadly allergic to them.

I'm all bunkered down with the door shut and a towel at the bottom to try to prevent any from sneaking in like ninjas to assassinate me. It's like Blackhawk Down in this place. I don't think we have another epipen handy, maybe they have some available at the new hospital. That would be convenient, I'll be there for hours tonight anyway!

Monday, August 3, 2009

Counting Hours

I lost internet at 9pm yesterday. Meaning it's been out for over sixteen hours. In that time I have read 1/4th of a book, finished 5 sketches (including the mother of all detail sketch), played more Sims 3 than I could think of things to do in Sims 3, and completely slain two pots of coffee.

To make matters worse, the number for my ISP is out of service. So I couldn't even call to complain.

If we're counting, which judging by the title we are, that makes two Sundays in a row my internet has prevented the slaying of e-monsters for virtual shinies. I'm going to go upload things before it goes out again and I have to /emo.

Edit: I had to /emo because the moment I posted this blog and went to upload, the internet went out, again. Just came back... let's hope for longer than five minutes this time.

Saturday, August 1, 2009

I Don't Know Why She Swallowed The Fly

So yesterday I managed to swallow a spider.

It was in my drink and I realized as I was swallowing but it was far too late to stop. All eight legs, nomnomnom! I sat there for a moment afterward like it had been some huge life defining moment, unsure of how to proceed. I began wondering if it was trying to climb out and then promptly decided not to think about it anymore.

No worry, my friends wouldn't let it pass so quickly.

"I wonder what it was thinking?"
"Yay! I'm swimming! Ah! OH GOD!"
"#*@& MY LIFE."
"What if he was like super ninja spider and slung web on the way down to avoid ultimate doom and is now living inside of you?"

Thanks for that last one, guys. That's not disturbing at all or anything. It was also decidedly a he who suffered from arachnid depression and his name was Albert. Apparently. This one's for you, Al. /salute

Zombies & Artificial Intelligence

I had a really cool dream last night. Pardon the hopping around, my internet keeps going out as I type and it makes me seem remarkably ADHD!

We had been on a little boat for brunch just off the coast and we wound up going through some sort of rift which threw us to the other side of the world, in the middle of the ocean, where we promptly crashed into an uncharted island. That was a huge sentence. Anyway...

It's the dead of night here and we can see the silhouette of a large structure peeking over the canopy of the trees in the distance. We decide it would be an ideal shelter, and may even have people in it, so we leave the beach and try to head for it. Our plan quickly changes when we realize two things. The first: there was peculiar swamp land separating us from the edge of the true forest that was dangerous to cross in the dark and that on top of that obstacle there were also terrible terrible zombies wandering about. At least 3 people died while their shoes were stuck in muck trying to flee from the undead.

We run up the beach until halted by a sheer rockface, meaning we could go no further to escape the zombies unless we tried to scale it in the dark. We take that chance and begin carefully working our way up onto this small jagged ledge about halfway up. Too low to get all the way up to the plateau but just out of zombie reach. If they lept or lunged at us they could grab the edge to pull themselves up, so we got no sleep at all, stomping on their rotty fingers and shoving them back down should they had managed to get up.

The zombies weren't slow creepy zombies from old movies and games, they were the smarter, faster kind you see in newer movies and games that run and jump and use basic animal instincts to devise strategies to catch their prey. Which in this case happened to be us. Eventually they figure out they could drop down on us from above if they went around, but not aren't smart enough to realize how long it would take them to get there. By morning they're gone, so we cautiously drop down to the sand and begin trying to master the first problem. The swamp.

One of guys who had been at brunch with us was a structural engineer and decides we should use some of the drift wood littering the beach to make a sort of bridge to hobble across it. Some other guy in a baseball hat says we should just tough it out and do our best to run through not wanting to waste time carrying wood up from the water. There's an argument about it and the guy in the baseball hat decides to show us how easy it is to get across by going alone. He wades through about halfway before realizing the bottom gets treacherous and the suction takes both of his shoes and stalls his advance. Each step takes him considerably longer as his feet get continuously stuck deeper and deeper in the mud.

So the rest of us agree with structural engineer guy and start gathering wood. Being stranded in the middle of no where on an island was bad enough. Being stranded in the middle of no where on an island full of zombies was horrible. The least we could do was spare our feet and keep our shoes.

We make it across by noon, damp from sweat and swamp, welcomed by the shade of the forest. We notice there are less zombies freely about in the daytime, and that the sunlight seems to keep them fairly oblivious to our presence if we move quietly. So we move without talking, barely taking a breath out of fear of drawing their attention.

As we get nearer to the structure we'd seen in the distance we find plane reckage and some old electronic equipment. I suggest we take some of it with us, out of hopes of making some sort of radio to call for help and some ex military guy agrees and helps me gather up the radio components and what appears to be a small server.

We reach the structure by the onset of dusk, and notice it appears to be an old castle that had been turned into some sort of base. Currently abandoned. The fence around it had been dismantled long before we arrived, barbed wire and links alike rended and rusted. The men climb over what's left and hold it down so the women can cross more safely to the other side. The building itself is red brick, broken in places to reveal the far far older gray stone beneath it. Tables and chairs in the courtyard are severely weathered and over turned, though they draw attention to a metal door with chipped green paint, ajar. The quickly fleeting sunlight urges us inside regardless of what may we waiting.

The floor is linoleum in some places and cobble in others, raked by claws and burnt in places. The walls had been covered in drywall and painted, but were in disrepair, water damage from unclosed but barred windows, and fire damage around doors like there had been some great explosion countless years before our arrival. In places where the floor had been truly damaged, plants grew, like there no rules of civilization at all. Some rooms had furniture, others did not, some rooms were accessible, others were concealed behind locked doors. Some seemed off limits only to be revealed by the turn of a corner and a hole in the wall where something had undoubtedly come through by force.

We close the doors behind us, and find they not only lock by key but also have heavy iron bars that can be lowered to further protect from unwanted entry. Though most of the glass had been broken, the windows are all barred on both sides -- the walls around them reinforced with more metal, banning entry or exit of any kind. Which pleases our structural engineer. We explore our new shelter all day, covering every inch we were permitted and finding little to no trace of who had been there before us aside from a kitchen full of canned food with no labels. Mind when I say full it was hardly appropriately shelved. Many of the cans were dented and rolling around freely on counter tops and the floor.

By now we're all hungry and exhausted, so military guy suggests we sleep in shifts. Four at a time so that we could keep an eye on one another as well as those who were sleeping. A sound idea everyone seems to agree with. When it comes around for my turn to keep watch, I get to work on some of the electronics we found. Many of the components were salvageable, and the server box, despite exterior wear and tear was undamaged inside. With electricity we'd have a working computer, that could perhaps tell us something. What was here, where here is, etc.

I was explaining this to one of the other women when structural engineer guy says most places like this would have their own generators since they can't get electricity from the mainland, we'd just need to find out where it was since he hadn't seen it inside anywhere.

When morning comes, the men folk head out to look for the generator and the rest of us go to the kitchen and open a few cans of food. Since there are no labels we wound up with a can of peas and a can of mushrooms. Food was food though, so we heated it up and when the guys got back we had peas and mushrooms. The generator was operational, but so old it would have to be tended to each morning if we wanted electricity for the entire day.

The next week or so I spend getting the electronic bits into some working order, and for the most part it's otherwise uneventful. People had moved stuff around to make our shelter a little more livable and baseball hat guy found keys to the locked rooms, so now we have access to the entire castle. I finally get the server up and running but it seems stubborn to relinquish any information. Military guy tries helping out with it and much swearing ensues. I'm afraid in his frustration he may break something, so I take the box away from him.

Oddly, after that, it begins working well for me. Though it doesn't have much information about what was here before us or curiously the plane it was found by. This place had been a psychiatric ward where patients were shipped for one reason or another in the 70's, but had been decommissioned since the early 80's. Exactly why patients were being sent to the middle of no where for psychiatric care wasn't explained and no names were found in relation to the topic either.

There was a map of the island and blueprints for the castle we were staying in, which our structural engineer found useful. I decide to keep the little server running, while we clean the place up a little more and make it a little more agreeable, since it became clear we'd be staying there for quite a while.

That night we're sitting around the lounge we'd made, as I'm working on the server and we hear a clutter from the hall. We look around and realize we're all in the room, so whatever was in the hall was something else entirely. One of the women tries to assure us it's likely only an animal. But when we open the door to look, it's of course horrible horrible zombies. The two dudes near the door are killed on the spot and just as quickly have risen as zombies to kill the rest of us. Two zombies now four.

Then, out of the blue, the computer starts playing some mish-mash of music and the zombies leave. We're all like, wtf? And the little computer's LEDs spell out i-n-a-r-i. So I go over there all curious like and it starts displaying random pictures on the monitor like flowers and sunrises and the baseball hat guy, who I had hoped would've been eaten by zombies by now, starts laughing saying the computer has a crush on me.

I sharply remind him the computer just saved him from being eaten by a zombie and he shuts the hell up.

A little searching in the computer's databases that were only now open to me, reveals that it was originally in the castle to keep the zombies away and during a power outage had been carried out for some reason. Where it then sat outwardly inactive and alone for like twenty years with nothing better to do than think and evolve -- until I came and insisted we take it back.

It, interestingly also has access to a chamber of the castle that could teleport two people back through the rift at a time, but only for twenty-four hour time spans. So we could travel back once a week for twenty-four hours to do whatever we could manage in those hours. But the catch was the A.I. would only trust me, so if anyone needed to go back, I had to go back with them. What's weird is the rift was never the same so we would sometimes end up in random locations or times. Like Russia, or 1824, etc. So going was not something we did often unless we needed something and were willing to risk getting it. Which is also why the A.I. always wanted to make sure I went, because it trusted I wouldn't mess up the time line, or something.

We wind up living there forever, I guess. Zombies attack, A.I. defends us, and so on and so forth. Eventually I got it networked back into the rest of the building so it could control cameras, loud speakers, and turrets and stuff. It was sooooo neat.