Thursday, September 27, 2012

Sapphire or Opal? Not An Exact Science

Pregnancy is not an exact science, not that much really ever is. It's a day past my due date now and there's still no sign that our little bundle of joy intends to join us outside of my womb any time soon. So I just lay around (read: wallow) growing more rotund and uncomfortable by the day.

It's not uncommon for first pregnancies to run up to ten days late, but here's the kicker -- since no one knows when precisely we conceived, my due date is just an estimate anyway. Essentially give or take two whole weeks. This means I may be pregnant for up to three more entire weeks! Or, I could go into labor while typing this. No one can say for certain.

I am 75% effaced though, and if I continue progressing at the rate I have been, that'll put me at 100% effaced by this weekend. After which point I can go into labor at any time.

It's a little funny because a couple of weeks ago, I'd have been happy with the baby taking his sweet time to arrive. Halloween? Sure, whatever. Stay in there as long as you want to, dude. Mostly because the thought of child birth is somewhat terrifying, notably the anticipation of pain and the absolute spontaneity of labor. I could be sitting here, fine, one minute and writhing in the throes of a contraction the next! There's no way to know.

However as time goes on, I become more and more uncomfortable, and am now to the point where I kind of can't wait to have this baby. Not simply because I'm excited to hold him and introduce him to the world, but because I'm also excited to not exist in a constant state of discomfort.

He sits so low right now that I experience intense pain in my hips whenever I stand up or roll over in bed. I think at times that my legs may actually fall off. No, seriously. It's that intense. From what I'm told, this is only going to get worse as he drops lower in preparation for birth. Oh boy.

My feet are swollen more often than not, making walking a challenge. Granted the pitting edema is kind of neat, like my feet are made of Play-doh -- you can push it around and leave indents with your fingers. Even if I elevate and ice them for hours they're swollen again within fifteen minutes of resuming normal activity.

Add to these things the fact that when he decides to roll around and kick he now consistently hits my cervix (a pain you can't comprehend unless you're a female) and it's like a trifecta of discomfort.

I can no longer tolerate sitting at my desk for any real length of time, which means significantly less video games and writing. Luckily I now have a smart phone (yay the future!) so I can at least browse the internet and keep in touch with people. I can't sketch because my hands are too achy to reliably hold a pencil. The mere act of taking a shower exhausts me. I'm alright laying in bed or on the sofa. I've basically become dependent on Netflix and reading to cure my boredom.

I've missed my first day of class because of it, something I hoped not to do until actual labor, but oh well. I'm not sure where my ASL2 professor stands on the issue, as he's yet to get back to me, but my ECE instructor has been very understanding and I'll be able to complete her coursework from home if I need to.

Granted every second of pain is worth it. I am creating a human being. It's just an overwhelming experience, sometimes. I'm not accustomed to having to lie down and take it easy. That's a foreign concept. I'm used to just go-go-go.

Thursday, September 6, 2012

Disclaimer & PSA To Social Media Moms

As I prepare to join Club Motherhood I just wanted to take a moment to reassure you all of something: I won't smother you in baby photos and updates constantly.

There's been a recent increase in such topics lately but that's more because I went from having four months to share the ups and downs of pregnancy with you to one month, so if I intend to share anything at all, it kind of has to be condensed.

This is something a lot of new mothers tend to do once their child is born, go into overload mode sharing anything and everything about baby and rarely if ever anything about themselves. As if their individuality as a human being no longer matters. I'm fully aware that once you've reproduced your entire outlook on life changes drastically. That tiny person will always, always come first in every little thing you do. That said, you as a woman, are still important. What you have to say is still relevant.

Friends and family all still want to know how your day was. They still want to know your opinion on things. Ten thousand updates about nothing but how the baby is sleeping right now, or how you fed the baby an hour ago do not tell them anything that isn't already assumed. They know your baby eats and sleeps. What are you up to in those welcome moments that you've found time to spare for yourself? Now sure, if baby is doing something particularly interesting, by all means share the hell out of it. People will be stoked. Just don't lose sight of yourself in the process.

It may at times feel like you've nothing interesting to write about, especially at first, since your world shrinks considerably in the months following delivery -- but trust me, there's something you have to say about yourself that we'll all be glad to hear.

Originally this blog was going to be about something else entirely (college) which I suppose I'll just get around to writing later, since this topic's already taken precedence. The disclaimer was only supposed to be a sentence or so, but then I felt obligated to follow it up with a public service announcement, because we all have "those friends" who suddenly never say anything that isn't baby-related.