Since I cannot feel my feet my doctors have collectively determined it wise for me to walk with assistance. Or severely limit time spent walking. This was meant to be bad news but I decided I'd make it good instead. Screw that. I made it a surprise. And it's awesome.
I'm too spiffy for a sterile-looking prescription cane or forearm crutch. No sirs and ma'ams, those won't do. So I got my measurements and did myself a favor. I now own a 36" ebony cane with silver collar and matching inscription plate. What could I have possibly had etched into my cane you may wonder? "Cowards die in shame."
A friend of mine regarded this as one step closer to becoming a female House, because I cannot refrain from being a smart ass. It's like the side of my brain saying "That's not nice," gets bitch slapped by the part of my brain going, "Hahaha!" Before I know it, I've said whatever it was regardless. All I have to do now is get a chemical dependency and a medical degree. I'll get right on that...
So anyway, Inari+cane. Who's bad?